If you believe a word my parents tell you about me then you will know my first word was no. Yip… not mamma or dada or anything else as cute as that… it was NO. Im pretty sure this picture will convince you.
So maybe it’s not such a surprise that I want to take some time to celebrate ‘NO’ today.
Every so often I will work with a couple who I fall in love with. We will go on a journey of some tough questions and new options and they will decide that they can’t actually afford to work with me or their celebration goes in a totally new direction and they have to say no to a Runaway Romance wedding.
Now I will be honest when I say I have a few moments of ‘oh crap I really wish they were going to use my services’, ‘Did I do something wrong?’, ‘Do I suck?’, ‘I knew I sucked’ and into my little spiral of doom I go… But when my ego climbs back in the cupboard and I realise what ACTUALLY just happened, I have an oh my gosh.. YES… fist bump to some freedom song that plays in my head, moment.
Because the truth is they are on the road to telling the world NO!
And if you are on the road to saying no as a couple then you are at a place where you can honestly and realistically face your budget AND make the hard decisions needed to respect it! And if you are doing this then you are respecting each other and your relationship more than your wedding DAY and that is pretty massive!
Because as a wedding couple your other options were to cave to the pressure of spending more than you could or should, to being afraid of the process and caring a bit too much about the result, and the other people involved and potentially even losing sight of the reason for this wedding day.
I’m not saying anyone who says yes to a wedding day and a wedding planner is wrong or weak or less…
Far from it!! A lot of my couples are with me because they have already found their no by keeping their guest list small and not caving to the courtesy invite and are on their own journey with me to a more focused day in one way or an other.
What I am saying is that too often we are told the yes is what will make us happy
‘Say yes to the dress’
‘Say yes to an extra guest because it will make your mom happy’
‘Say yes to an extra glass of wine’
‘Say yes to (insert any of the millions of things we say Yes to because we think we have to here _____________)’
When actually I think we could all be a lot happier with a few more no’s in our life.
We personally said no to any ‘on the day introductions’ at our wedding. So no one that would have needed to be introduced to either of us on the wedding day was invited.
What is the one thing you are battling to say No to? What are the consequences (good or bad) if you say Yes to this even though your gut is telling you otherwise? Do you really want to live with those consequences?
How about celebrating the No and the freedom and respect it shows you have for yourself!
You can do this.. and if you feel you can’t send me a mail or leave an anonymous comment below and I/we will help you to find a way to do it… and then we will celebrate you afterwards!